The Prank Wars
by autobotgirl12328
Summary: Who is the master of pranks? Is is Sunstreaker or is it Sideswipe or is it...Ratchet?
1. let the war begin

**Author's note**

The Prank Wars are a dangerous game! Don't try at home. If you do don't blame me! Don't own…yada yada…you get it…let's go!

The Prank War

Let the war begin

"Get back here!" Ratchet ordered. The twins were scampering off after another prank.

"Those two need leashes!" Ratchet grumbled. He walked back to his room. He knew the twins had something else in plan. He could hear their snickering even if he were miles away. He soon reached his room, across from his lab. He scavenged for his key. He soon found it and was unlocking the door. Suddenly, as the door slid open, Ratchet heard a disturbing hum.

"A generator?" he gasped. He flew forward. His feet scrapped across the slick clean floor as he was being pulled along. He crashed into the side of the wall. He slowly looked up and soon glue rained on him. He spat some sloppy glue out of his mouth. Then came the feathers. He twisted around and hammed the wall. The humming stopped.

"Twins!" he groaned in a faint whisper.

"HA!" the twins wailed from the doorway.

"Hmm," Ratchet growled. He smiled evilly.

"Nice one," he whispered. They paused.

"Uh-huh," Sunstreaker smiled. Sideswipe nodded.

"Tell me, you two are so good at pranks but who is the best?" Ratchet chuckled.

"I am," the two cheered, pointing to themselves.

"NO, I am!" they spat at each other.

"You can't **both** be the master of pranks," Ratchet lied. They were both capable of driving him to his death. He swallowed the thought.

"I come up with the best ones!" Sunstreaker boasted.

"The best **stupid** ones! I'm ones!" Sideswipe cheered. Ratchet smiled and brushed off some feathers. The twins gave solid glares.

"Prepare, brother, for a war you won't soon forget!" Sunstreaker snickered.

"You should be the one who should be prepare!" Sideswipe yelled. Ratchet smiled.

"This means war!" the twins cried, exiting the room.

"I'll have my own share in this 'war'. If I keep the two pitted against each other they'll leave me be!" Ratchet snickered, "Let the wars begin."

**Author's note**

Who is the king of Pranks? Is it Sunstreaker or is it Sideswipe or is it Ratchet?

Read and Review…or me delete this!

P.s… I need pranks for these three to war on! Give me one in a review and it could be the features prank!

Happy Pranking!!!!


	2. Sticky fingers

**Author's note**

Thanks to my lone reviewer, Jessie07. Here is chapter 2, Sticky fingers. In this chapter we have basically only two pranks, the usual for the chapters to come. Have fun and laugh, Please!

Sticky fingers

Ratchet snuck into Sunstreaker's room, across from Sideswipe's new room. Sunstreaker had his arm hanging out of his bed and his body stretched out. Ratchet dropped a bucket he pulled out from his lab. He pulled out a brush- from Wheeljack's room- and threw it into the bucket. Sunstreaker let out a snore.

"Prepare for prank number 1," Ratchet whispered. He lifted up the brush and gently dabbed it on Sunstreaker's hand. He snickered as his work went on. Soon he was finished and lifted his things. He slunk out of the room, sliding the door close behind him. He snickered as he went through the halls.

--Later that same day—

"So Ratchet, what's up with the twins?" Wheeljack asked at breakfast. Ratchet slowly looked up.

"What do you mean?" Ratchet smiled.

"They asked for separate rooms," Jazz gasped.

"As brothers, they never liked that," Wheeljack explained.

"I got the two to leave me alone by getting them into a war with each other," Ratchet answered.

"Huh," Jazz hummed, "A pranks war. I could enjoy this."

"Good morning Sideswipe," the table cheered as Sideswipe walked by. His eyes trying to stay open.

"Probably thought Sunny would get him in his sleep," Jazz laughed.

"Speaking of getting them in their sleep," Ratchet chuckled. The table turned to him.

"AH!" Sunstreaker's voice echoed through the ship. Sideswipe lifted his head off the table. Sunstreaker walked in, his hand stuck to his head.

"Ha," Sideswipe bellowed. Sunstreaker stepped in front of Sideswipe, waving a finger.

"You did this!" Sunstreaker growled.

"No, I didn't, I stayed up all night working on pranks but have yet to trigger them!" Sideswipe boasted.

"Prepare, young brother! I will have my revenge," Sunstreaker screamer, storming out.

"Ratchet you didn't?!" Jazz wailed.

"Anything to leave me be," Ratchet snickered.

"Ratchet, I didn't know you had the spark!" Wheeljack cheered. Ratchet stood up and walked out. He walked down the hall of the ship and stopped by Sunstreaker's room. Sunstreaker was scribbling on a page, pouring liquid and cutting fabrics. Ratchet smiled lightly and continued to his workshop.

--Later--

WAAAAAAA!" Sideswipe's yell went off around noon. Ratchet thought it was unusually high pitched. He looked out his door to see Jazz, Bumblebee, and Bluestreak running from Sideswipe's blasts. Ratchet peered down the hall to see Sideswipe in human makeup, a handmade, poorly done, poke-o-dot dress, and his voice was higher pitched.

"Sunny!" Sideswipe squeaked. Ratchet chuckled.

"Yes," Sunstreaker smiled. Sideswipe put his hands on his hip, making his look like an angry women. Sunstreaker burst out laughing followed by Jazz, Bluestreak and Bumblebee.

"Ratchet knew he'd have to be the one to fix Sideswipe but this was worth it. He didn't think either had the guts to prank each other. The war was one that was going to last!

**Authors' note**

What will be the next prank that Ratchet pulls? Who will it be on? How long will this war last? I like to ask questions you might not get the answer too!!!! Happy pranking!


	3. Sounds of war

**Author's note**

Quick for chapter 3. This chapter, I think, was cruel to Sides and yet I made it up!!!!!

Sounds of war

3:10am

Ratchet opened Sideswipe's door. Sideswipe's room was covered in markers, pens, papers, notes, pictures, fabrics, spillen liquids, torn paper, and a pillow. Ratchet looked over to Sideswipe. He was neatly lying on his bed, better than his brother the other night. Ratchet pulled in a large box. He sat in the middle of the room and reached into the box. He pulled out a handful of gold alarm clocks. He smiled.

3:50am

Bring! Bring! Sideswipe snapped open his eyes and twisted around. Millions of ringing!

"What is going on?!" Sideswipe screamed. He noticed the ring of alarm clocks around him. He screamed and shot at them. They fell off the bed in smokes and flames. The ringing still went on. Sideswipe ran to the door. He hit the control box. It didn't open. Sideswipe pounded on the door, hoping for help. No one came! Sideswipe wailed and faced his ringing room. He grasped his head.

"Make it stop!" Sideswipe wailed. He fell to his knees and wailed again.

On the outside of the door stood Ratchet. He watched Optimus walk to breakfast.

"Morning Ratchet," Optimus hummed. Ratchet nodded as Optimus left. Ratchet smiled.

"Three…Two…One…" Ratchet whispered and elbowed the control box. The door slid open.

The alarm's ringing got Sunstreaker out of his room Ratchet looked at him as if the door opened on its own. One the floor of the room was Sideswipe, in a ball, shaking. Sunstreaker looked on in confusion.

"So much ringing…so much…" Sideswipe whimpered.

"Sides?" Sunstreaker whispered. Sideswipe stopped and stood up. He eyed Sunstreaker.

"You are going to pay!" Sideswipe cried. He stomped away. Sunstreaker blinked twice then looked at Ratchet. Ratchet looked to him and shrugged.

"Might as well get some more sleep," Sunstreaker yawned. He stepped back into his own room and closed the door.

"Phase two complete," Ratchet chuckled. He looked into Sideswipe's room and clicked a button. The alarm clocks' ringing stopped. Ratchet smiled and walked down to the lunch hall. As he was walking down he saw Sideswipe pulling and a bucket out of Wheeljack's office. Sideswipe slipped out of the room and rushed back toward his room Ratchet continued.

"NOW YOU DECIDE TO STOP!" Sideswipe yelled.

"Poor kids," Ratchet laughed, entering the mess hall.

He sat down across from the giggling Jazz and Bluestreak. They looked up.

"You placed the clocks in Sides room?!" Bluestreak chuckled. Ratchet nodded, pulling out a pad. He made a check wave with his hand.

"How far are you planning to go?" Jazz asked.

"Not sure," Ratchet sighed.

"Sideswipe slowly moved into the breakfast hall. Ratchet watched as he moved over to the twin's scamming table. Sideswipe laid his head down and sniffled. Bluestreak got up and went to Sideswipe's side. Ratchet sighed. Tearing the two apart was sad but he had to do it, for his sanity.

"HELP!" A yelp cried out. It was best known as Sunstreaker's annual cry. Bluestreak stood up but Sideswipe pulled him down. Ratchet sadly got up and went to search for Sunstreaker. He looked down the hall.

"HELP!" It sounded as if it was from his room. Ratchet walked down the hall, Jazz, Bluestreak, Sideswipe, and Bumblebee behind him. He opened the door. It slid open revealing Sunstreaker coated with glue and stuck to his bed.

"You!" Sunstreaker spat at Sideswipe.

"Me?" Sideswipe mocked. Sunstreaker groaned.

"You will…I will get you sides! This means war!" Sunstreaker bellowed. By then the others were laughing and red in the face. Ratchet watched through the laughter at Sunstreaker. He was only thinking.

'How far will it go?'

**Author's note**

How far _will_ this go? Who will be the crowned king of pranks? Will Ratchet tell the twins what he's done out of sadness for separating them? Well keep reading to find out! Don't forget to give me prank ideas to put in here! Happy pranking!


	4. Changing properties

Featured pranks by…

Pharaonin-prank done by Sideswipe to Sunstreaker

Shimmershadow30- prank done by Sunstreaker to Sideswipe

Changing properties

Ratchet had woken up late that morning and lost his pad, which had all the data of the war. He decided to do a simple old school prank. A bucket of oil above the door. When the prankee steps in he'd get dumped in oil. Ratchet was very busy that day, yesterday the Decepticons had attacked and he had to fix Bumblebee up. The twins had been quiet with the lack of glue. Wheeljack found out that it was his glue being used and forbid them from using anymore.

Ratchet set the trap and walked off to his office. No matter who it was the twins would fight over it. He returned to fixing Bumblebee up. Then there were howls of laughter and quick fire. Ratchet looked at the door. Bumblebee sat up and looked at Ratchet. Ratchet glared back and went to the door. He slid it open to find Jazz and Bluestreak running from Sideswipe's and Sunstreaker's quick fire. Ratchet peered down the hall. He found both of the warriors covered in a gooey, sticky oil and a bucket over Sunstreaker's head.

"You ruined my paint job!" Sunstreaker snapped at Sideswipe. Ratchet smiled.

"You got oil up my rifles!" Sideswipe cried.

"Me? You planted that trap!" Sunstreaker accused.

"What!? You planted it!" Sideswipe growled.

"Fine, you want to play fast ball, I'm game!" Sunstreaker snickered, leaving.

--Later--

Ratchet walked in between the twin's room. He knocked on Sunstreaker's door. No answer.

"Sunny, you alright?" Ratchet called.

Yes!" Sunstreaker gasped, "Nothing's wrong!" Ratchet turned and knocked on Sideswipe's door.

"I'm fine," Sideswipe sobbed. Ratchet sighed. He whistled loudly. Usually the two would bolt out, fearing what he'd do if they didn't.

A few minutes later, Sunstreaker's door opened. Ratchet held back his smile and laugh when he saw Sunstreaker's perfect blond coat had been painted pink and purple. Sunstreaker sniffled and shook his head. They waited for Sideswipe.

Sideswipe came out with a pot of flowers. He had a sad look. It wasn't as worse as Sunstreaker's paint job but his weapons had been replaced with plants.

"My rifle, my blasters, my flares, everything! All plants!" Sideswipe whimpered. Sunstreaker growled.

"Silly weapons can be replaced but my perfect gold paint job…that's harder to get back!" Sunstreaker sobbed.

"Give it a rest! They're water colors! They'll wash right off!" Sideswipe suggested.

"They better," Sunstreaker cheered, disappearing back into his room. Sideswipe gave Ratchet a nod then went back into his room. Ratchet sighed.

"Wonder what would happen if I shot myself right now," Ratchet hummed. He marched back to his office to finish his repairs on Bumblebee. When he got back he found Bumblebee messing with a power drill. He sighed and smacked himself in the head as Bumblebee and his power drill met each other.

**Author's note**

Poor Sunny. Next time we will have a featured prank by Shimmersadow30 and wolvesrule3265. Happy pranking!


	5. Learning of the trouble

**Author's note**

Because of the number of threats I'm receiving I've decided to update. I don't like this chapter though, it has but one…I repeat ONE prank. You can skip this or you can hear about Sideswipe's TV trouble and Optimus finding out about the twins prank war along with the mastermind behind it, Ratchet.

Learning of trouble

"Free TV time?" sideswipe read. He had a small piece of paper that said he could have the whole TV to himself. He was walking there now. What he didn't know was this was all Sunstreaker's idea. Sideswipe entered the room. It was empty all except for a large metal couch and an even larger Television.

"Weird, usually this room is colorful," Sideswipe hummed. He walked over to the television and turned it on. He collapsed onto the couch as the TV came on. He blinked twice and noticed it was the news. He reached for the remote and clicked a button. Nothing…

"AH!" he screamer, "News isn't fun!"

Outside the closed-and locked- room, Sunstreaker listened to his brother's screams. He chuckled.

"Sides always hated anything serious like the news…or Optimus!" Sunstreaker nodded. He marched off.

--Later--

Jazz and Bluestreak walked past the TV room. The door was close muffling sounds of screaming.

"You don't think…?" Jazz gulped.

"Only one way to find out," Bluestreak sighed. Jazz opened the door. Sideswipe laid by the door whimpering.

"Buffy the dragon…News…Animal Planet…" Sideswipe whimpered.

"Poor you," Jazz giggled. They closed the door and burst out laughing. Optimus happened to be walking by when he noticed their laughter.

"What's so funny?" he asked.

"Sunny and Sideswipe!" Bluestreak gasped.

"What about them?" Optimus gulped.

"They're battling each other! We call it the Prank Wars!" Jazz explained. Optimus growled.

"I will not have this!" Optimus yelled.

"You try talking sense into them. I don't think I can handle any more of this!" Jazz chuckled. Optimus opened the door and pulled Sideswipe to his feet.

"Office now!" Optimus ordered, pulling Sideswipe along. Sideswipe blinked twice.

"Huh?" he mumbled.

--In his office--

"Will you two stop!?" Optimus ordered. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe were sissy fighting.

"You cannot have the two together," Wheeljack explained, leaving the office.

"Sunstreaker! Wait outside!" Optimus yelled. Sunstreaker proudly got up and left.

"How did this start?" Optimus groaned.

"Well Ratchet asked which was the best prankster. I said me and Sunny said him! We began fighting!" Sideswipe explained.

"Thank you, you can go and bring your brother in," Optimus explained. Sideswipe left and soon Sunstreaker was back in his seat. Optimus leaned back in his chair.

"How'd this start?" Optimus gulped.

"Well Ratchet asked who was the best prankster. I'm defiantly it but my brother thinks otherwise…" Sunstreaker grunted.

"Ratchet," Optimus sighed, leaning over his desk. Sunstreaker stood up and skipped off.

"Prowl!" Optimus called. Prowl peeked in.

"Get Ratchet down here," Optimus sighed.

"On it," Prowl nodded, running ff.

"Never excepted it to be Ratchet…" Optimus sighed, "On second thought, yeah Ratchet!" Ratchet hummed, stepping in.

"I hate you…!" Optimus groaned, his head on his desk. Ratchet chuckled.

"You found out the war didn't ya?" Ratchet winced. Optimus sat up and nodded.

"Why Ratchet? Why?" Optimus begged.

"Sorry sir but they were just…I was just…it just…" Ratchet stuttered.

"This is going to be a long explanation," Optimus sighed.

**Author's note**

Next Chapter is Sunny's caffeine trip and Sides well don't want to give everything away…sorry if you didn't like this chapter. I didn't like it much either…


	6. Hyperactive Realization

**Author's note**

I've returned! NOW are the pranks by Shimmershadow30 and Wolvesrule3265. Sorry for the miss print last time.

Featured pranks by…

Shimmershadow30- done by Sideswipe to Sunstreaker

Wolvesrule3265- done by Ratchet to Sideswipe

Hyperactive Realization

Sunstreaker was walking down the hall one morning. Usually he wouldn't be awake during this time but thanks to the war's early wakeup call he was taking a walk. While passing his room for the third time he heard giggling. Not childish giggling Sideswipe usually does while plotting but an old crust giggling, the type Ratchet chokes on when the pranks of the two would back fire.

Sunstreaker peeked in and saw something shocking! Ratchet had Sideswipe pasted to the wall and was painting on his face. Sunstreaker smiled and dove into his room. After hunting through his tattered room he found a camera. He was lucky to find Ratchet still working on the slumbering Sideswipe. Sunstreaker quickly pressed record and pointed to Ratchet painting on Sideswipe. Sunstreaker wanted to scream "I've got you" but what fun would that be?

--Later--

Sunstreaker laid in bed thinking of what he saw Ratchet doing to his brother. He planned the whole war. It was up to Sunstreaker to stop it. Slowly and with a heaping of fun and pranks!

"AH!" that would be Sides right on cue. Sunstreaker got up and walked into his twin's room.

"Hey Sides," Sunstreaker waved.

"You did this!" Sideswipe accused.

"Bo, it was-" Sunstreaker pulled out the camera and set it on his brother's bunk.

"When you want to listen watch it," Sunstreaker huffed, leaving his brother.

"I hate you?" Sideswipe mumbled.

--Later--

"Now Sunstreaker maybe this'll teach ya to not weld mechs to the wall!" Jazz snapped. Sunstreaker stepped into the brig and sat behind the door.

"I will only ask for a snack," Sunstreaker nodded. Jazz closed the door and walked off.

**Meanwhile**

"Jazz!" Sideswipe whispered. Jazz stepped over to him with a stern face.

"What is it, Wall boy?" Jazz snickered.

"Give my brother this!" Sideswipe offered, handing out a purple jug.

"Why? What is it?" Jazz questioned, holding it.

"It's pure sugar. That should drive him up the wall!" Sideswipe snickered. Jazz smiled.

"Fine but you take full blame!" Jazz nodded.

**At the brig**

"Here ya go!" Jazz snickered, offering Sunstreaker a purple jug. Sunstreaker took it and looked it over. He looked up.

"What is it?" He asked. Jazz shrugged.

"Just drink it!" he snapped.

"Alright Jazz," Sunstreaker hummed. He lifted the bottle and drank a third of it. He lowered the jug and shook slightly. Jazz watched him.

"You alright kid?" Jazz questioned after Sunstreaker didn't move for five minutes.

"THATWASREALLYGOOD!" Sunstreaker shouted.

"Primus! He's talkin' like Blur!" Jazz bellowed.

"MOREWOULDBEAWHOLELOTGOODRIGHTNOW! Sunstreaker raced. He lifted the cup and drank the rest. Jazz's eyes widened. He watched as Sunstreaker flickered his optics and transformed twenty times in ten seconds.

"Jazz what's going…" Prowl stopped once he noticed Sunstreaker jumping on the desk and Jazz cowering under it.

"Primus! Did you give him sugar?" Prowl gasped. Jazz simply shook violently.

"Sunstreaker stop!" Prowl ordered. Sunstreaker froze, sparked a little and fell off the desk.

"What…What'd ya do?" Jazz stuttered.

"The sugar finally stopped, short circuiting him!" Prowl explained.

"I'll take care of him!" Sideswipe claimed.

"Why should we trust you?" Jazz wailed.

"Please just trust me I need to talk to him!" Sideswipe pleaded. Prowl nodded.

"Fine but no pranks while he's in this condition!" Prowl ordered. Sideswipe nodded.

--Later--

"Sunny?" Sideswipe hummed as his yellow brother came back on line.

"What? How? You!" Sunstreaker replied, sitting up.

"I'm sorry. If you told me instead of giving me your camera then I wouldn't have done it!" Sideswipe sighed. Sunstreaker smiled.

"Now you know about Ratchet?" he asked.

"Yea but how do we stop him?" Sides questioned.

"We fight pranks with the twin terror's pranks!" Sunny cheered.

**Author's note**

Ratchet is in for it! Any prank ideas of how to torture Ratchet? I'm sure there are quite a lot! I need your help for the twins to win!

Happy pranking!


	7. Preschool Prank

**Author's note**

I'm back! Sorry for the wait…other stories and writer's block (Slag I hate that!) This chapter is the revenge of the twin terrors!

Preschool prank

"Are you sure about this Sunny?" Sideswipe whimpered. Sunstreaker silenced his brother.

"You got the toys?" Sunny replied.

"Yep, got 'em from the sparkling pen but why?" Sideswipe questioned, again silenced.

"You'll see, brother, you'll see…" Sunstreaker snickered.

They snuck into the med bay. Ratchet slept in one of the chairs. As Sunstreaker ran around, switching the toys for Ratchet's tools, Sideswipe sneaked up to Ratchet. He pulled out a marker. He drew over Ratchet's face plate till Ratchet groaned, perking Sunny's attention. Sides didn't care and pulled out a hat and bill. He placed them on Ratchet and quickly ran for a welder and a few knock-out shots.

After Sideswipe had finished, Sunstreaker was holding back his strongest laugh.

"Shall we go, bro?" Sideswipe smiled.

"S…Su…Sure…" chuckled Sunstreaker.

As they snuck out they knew, right then and there, that they were sure to get it. But to keep away from suspicion they prepared an "act" to through Ratchet off the rebels in the war.

--Later--

Ratchet woke up dozer, more than usual. He looked around. Why was his welding torch by his chair? His optics widened.

"Mumker…" Ratchet mumbled. He stood up and stormed to his mirror.

He froze looking into the reflection. He had a hat on his head that looked like an organic animal commonly referred to as a duck. His mouth had been welded shut to make the bill, glued above it, more reasonable. He also had marker glasses around his optics. He looked at his hands. His fingers were welded together. His optics narrowed.

He stormed out and walked for the Rec Room. He threw open the doors.

"Hey Ratch…Duck?" Jazz gasped.

"Mmmmmm…" Ratchet mumbled, stomping his foot.

"What's wrong? Cat welded your mouth shut?" Prowl groaned, smiling slightly.

"It's what you get for all this!" Bumblebee nodded.

Sunstreaker and Sideswipe walked in. Ratchet turned waving his hand at them.

"Ratchet…a duck?" Sideswipe mumbled.

"Why didn't I think of that?" Sunstreaker chuckled. Sideswipe glared him.

"You could never surpass my supreme thinking," Sideswipe hummed.

"Did you read Prowl's dictionary again?" Sunstreaker smiled. Sideswipe blushed.

"Maybe or maybe I'm just superior to you in every way!" Sideswipe proclaimed.

"More like inferior, lady bot!" Sunstreaker bellowed.

"While they're screaming at one another, I'll fix ya up Ratch-duck," Wheeljack cheered. Ratchet's optics widened as Wheeljack pulled him off. Sunstreaker and Sideswipe went on with their "argument" till the two left. Afterward, they burst out laughing.

"Good one, bro!" Sunstreaker screamed.

"Just wait till your prank kicks in!" Sideswipe winked. Jazz tilted his head.

"What's going on?" Bumblebee gasped.

"We found out 'bout Ratchet's secret involvement. Now we're going to drive him up the wall till he cracks!" Sideswipe explained. Bumblebee, Bluestreak, and Jazz smiled wickedly.

"We're at you assistance!" they snickered.

--Later--

Ratchet settled into a chair in his lab and stuffed a handful of medical pills into his mouth, freely open now. His face plate was burnt red from Wheeljack's treatment. Ratchet shuddered at the memory. He pulled out something Prime told him to fix. He needed a hammer. He dove into his desk, looking for his tool.

Instead of finding his large grey hammer, he found a slightly smaller pink and orange hammer. He pounded it against the desk making it squeak. He frowned. He could get back to hammering. He could use a screw driver now.

He looked through his desk again. Instead of finding his blue driver he found a purple, squeaking toy driver. His eyes twitched. His drill…a toy, his wrench…a toy, his ratchet…a toy…All his tools had been replaced with sparkling toys. He twitched.

"TWINS!"

**Author's note**

Well more ideas I know are a waiting in your mind. Tell me quick! I want to really drive Ratchet up the wall.


	8. MiniChapter: Hunting for tools

**Author's note**

I live! Sorry for not being around in a while, I've got tons of new stuff but I should really remember the old and funny. I used to write the stuff down before typing it up too…who knows where that notebook went! Here is a short, mini-chapter until I get the real one up.

Inspired by whitedino's review for the last chapter. Let's see how far Ratchet gets as he ponders.

Mini-chapter

Hunting for tools

"When I get my servos on those two unconvinced, not even Primus himself will be able to stop me!" swore Ratchet to the skies.

He marched down the halls, a squeaky child's hammer wrapped in his tightly fixed grasp. His faceplate was still a muffled red. This showed just how angry he was. He stormed down the hall, his footsteps echoing in loud thunderous stomps. He stopped at his first destination: Jazz and Blaster's room.

The door swished open, revealing the angry medic to the two insiders. The silhouette of the angry Autobot showed menacing and disturbing the medic was. Jazz shivered at the thought as he entered further. Ratchet lifted Jazz off the ground. Jazz whimpered.

"Where. Are. They?" Ratchet said slowly into the face of the fellow Autobot.

"Who ever do you mean?" stuttered Jazz, a smile curled.

"You know who I mean!" hissed Ratchet, shaking Jazz.

"The twins…right? They're in their separate rooms. Furious at one another…" Jazz explained. "They think the other performed that wonder-"

Jazz was cut off as he noticed the irritated expression on the medic. Jazz faked a smile and corrected himself.

"I mean…terrible prank on you," Jazz mumbled.

"Right," Ratchet hissed, dropping Jazz.

"Maybe Bumblebee or Bluestreak would know more about this," Jazz offered.

"They better," Ratchet swore, exiting in hast.

Ratchet continued down the hall but stopped before reaching Bumblebee and Bluestreak's room. He stopped in between the rooms of Sunstreaker and Sideswipe. He looked from door to door then hissed. The doors quickly opened, revealing the twins. They swiftly stepped out of their rooms.

"Can we help you?" Sunstreaker mumbled.

"Did we do something wrong?" Sideswipe whispered.

"You know what you two did! I don't know why, I don't know how but I know you two did it. Both of you!" hissed Ratchet.

"Don't hurt me," Sideswipe cheered, "It was his fault probably."

"Mine? I would never hurt Ratchet," pleaded Sunstreaker.

"Shut up!" ordered Ratchet, "I will get revenge. I swear!"

With that, Ratchet stormed off. Sunstreaker gave Sideswipe a twisted smile. Sideswipe mirrored the smile. The two nodded, reentering their rooms. It was only a matter of time now. Only a matter of time.

**Author's note**

Next chapter, I've decided, will be Shimmershadow30 and Afrolady114. Though they will be altered to something different, but the idea of it is still there. Till then, Happy Pranking.


	9. The ground beneath your feet

A/N

I know I've been off the radar for this story for a long time. I'm determined to finish it before too deep into the summer. Since these chapters never go above 700 words, that shouldn't be hard. I will no longer be taking prank requests though. I have planned the entire rest of the story out, which is four chapters including this one.

To anyone still reading this from long ago, welcome back and enjoy the rest of this story.

The prank wars

The ground beneath your feet

The war had been on delay for some time. It was unsure how long the battles had stopped but every ark member knew when they began again. It was a three in one prank against Ratchet, the only mech who still hadn't figured out the twins knew his secret. It was an average day. Ratchet was on patrol when the twins slowly and carefully entered the medic's lab, hands full of buckets.

"This is gonna be awesome," smirked Susntreaker.

"Shhh!" ordered Sideswipe. "Don't want to alert anyone…"

"Right…right," Sunstreaker snickered.

Sunstreaker set down the bucket of glue, and Sideswipe set down the bucket of paint. Together, the two set to work on their latest prank.

-Later-

Ratchet grumbled to himself as he marched back to his room. Something wasn't sitting with him well. It had been weeks since the twins had fought each other, much less him. After the patrol, he was just happy to go to his room as relax. Reaching his office, he found the door sticky and won't open as easily as before. Finally shoving the thing open, Ratchet groaned upon looking at the room. He wish he had just left the door shut.

The room, he knew, was his though it didn't look like his. The room held more of a Wheeljack look to it with scattered messes and design plans upon the walls. Oil was spilled and paint was scattered. With one twitching optic, Ratchet slowly entered, only to step on some oversized marbles. With a yelp, he went flying into the room. He knew the twins routine, grabbing onto the nearest table before he hit the wall which tottered with a bot on one of the shelves. Ratchet smiled.

"Take that, idiots," he snapped.

Then he slipped. As far as the other bots are concerned, they hadn't heard Ratchet screaming for assistance until after the evening shifts began, though the medic protests he'd been yelling longer. Either way, after their shifts were done, Jazz and Wheeljack found Ratchet glued to the floor of his office which was redesigned to look like Wheeljack's. Wheeljack was overjoyed.

"When I get my servos on those two…" grumbled Ratchet as Jazz and a newly found Ironhide helped him out of the glue covered floor.

"You'll do what?" hissed Ironhide, "You've already declared war on them, made them fight each other and now that they know what you've took they've turned on you. What more can you do?"

"Fight back," groaned Ratchet, standing on his feet if not a bit wobbly.

"With what, hatchet? Face it, the twins are the master of pranks," Jazz instructed.

"I will not be beaten by those brats," hissed Ratchet, marching away.

"You've been beaten by them loads of times, already," shrugged Ironhide. "What's different about this time?"

"I will not be beaten by those brats!" repeated Ratchet, louder and with a sense of anger burning through his optics.

"Ratchet, just give it up," begged Jazz, stepping forward. "The twins will not give up and they will smoother you with pranks until you give in. Save yourself and get out now."

"No."

"C'mon Ratchet," pleaded Jazz, leaning on the desk beside the medic. "You've got nothing to lose if you give up."

"My pride, respect and sense of victory," Ratchet listed.

"You had those at the start of this?" Ironhide mumbled. Ratchet gave him a cold glare which was replied by, "I think I heard someone calling me."

"C'mon Hatchet," Jazz repeated.

"Nothing you say is going to change my mind," grumbled Ratchet, looking away.

"You've force my hand, hatchet. I'm going to have to resort to something, neither parties of this war would like to have involves," Jazz hummed, walking away.

"That would be?" chuckled Ratchet.

"Oh, I think you know," smirked Jazz, exiting the lab.


	10. The unlikeliest of retaliations

The prank wars

The unlikeliest of retaliations

Ratchet stormed through the base, a mission ahead and a prank in mind. The threat Jazz had given was quickly forgotten, though with some force. Ratchet couldn't help but scoff at Jazz's poor attempt at trying to make Ratchet scared. The twins had been trying for years to scare the skid plates off him and it hadn't worked so far. The threats of children were pointless.

"Children, that's what those two are," huffed Ratchet, digging up something from the locked storage room in the back of the ship. This room was forbidden, and Ratchet knew it. This sole room was home to every discarded and forgotten prank parts leftover from the twins. It was prank graveyard, and all feared to tread upon it. Ratchet wasn't frightened as all, knowing exactly what to dig up.

"If they insist on acting like children, I'll give them something fit for their age," smirked Ratchet, finding what he was looking for and placing it under his arm. He checked the time quickly. He only had a megacycle and a half, or the equivalent to one and half human hours.

"Best be getting to work," chuckled Ratchet, locking the door behind him.  
_

The twins had sentry duty from noon till five, a long five hours of nothing but staring at the horizon in hopes of something exploding nearby or Decepticons being stupid enough to invade. Nothing of that sort happened, depressing the two as they reentered with drained beings. All they wanted was to relax in either the rec room or their own rooms. Along the way, Jazz stopped them.

"Boy, do you two look beat," hummed Jazz, folding his arms across his chest.

"What do you want, Jazz?" snapped Sunstreaker.

"We're tired," added Sideswipe.

"I want to talk to you two about this stupid prank war you have with Ratchet. You guys are going way too far with this junk," complained Jazz, shaking his head.

"I'll stop ya right there," sighed Sideswipe, waving a finger.

"We are not about to give up on tormenting Ratchet now, especially when the gettin's good," nodded Sunstreaker.

"I'm not saying you have to stop pranking the mech but you need to take the notch from war to play," Jazz instructed.

"Or what?" the two snapped, crossing their arms.

"Or else," resorted Jazz. The two didn't back down. "You've been warned."

Jazz stormed away with heavy steps. The twins exchanged looks, almost worried of what Jazz might do in order to stop this war. The doubt quickly passed as the feeling of dreadful tiredness returned and they continued their way to their rooms. Reaching the two rooms, the two again exchanged looks. They were tired to the different rooms now. Nodding in mental agreement, they turned and both entered Sunstreaker's room, seeing as it used to be both of theirs.

Opening the door, they both froze in sheer horror too much for their processors to handle. They didn't even have the mental power to scream for help or mercy. They simply stared at the newly decorated room that lay before them. They recalled the bright Carebear wallpaper from an earlier prank from the past. It covered every square inch of the room, not including the furniture which was painted in bright pinks and purples.

The two entered slowly, still in too much shock for an exchange of words. At first they thought it might've been Jazz but the room soon hand Ratchet's handy work written all over it. The two frowned, near snarling in rage. That's when the music kicked in. they recalled the music too, the Puff the Magic Dragon music, from another of their earlier done works. The tape was old but played as it used to, at a volume too loud to ignore.

Together, they finally screamed, racing out of the room and across the hall into Sideswipe's. It was also covered in Carebears and Puff the Magic Dragon music blaring from every direction. They yelped once more, collapsing upon their knees in between the two open rooms. Jazz and Blaster arrived first, soon followed by Ironhide who closed the rooms. The two hugged onto each other violently, afraid to let go of one another. Jazz knelt down beside them on one knee, a smirk upon his face.

"Can we end this war now?" he hummed.

The twins hesitated a moment, gathering themselves from the terror that had just experienced. Sideswipe pulled himself away first, standing up with a quick leap and frown upon his face. He stood over Jazz, tall and proud with revenge in his optics. Jazz sighed. Sunstreaker soon leapt up as well, standing by his brother. The two held their hands upon their hips, frowning and glaring forward.

"We won't leave this war with that evil medic winning! It'll look like we lost and my pride won't let that happen!" declared Sideswipe. "Sorry, Jazz, but this is either gonna end in our favor or not at all!"

With that, Sideswipe ran off in search of a new HQ while the horrible, unspeakable things from their rooms were removed. Sunstreaker followed in great strides. Jazz groaned, standing up and snapping his fingers. Both sides refused to come to peaceful terms. This meant he would have to take the end of the war into his own hands.

"Whatcha gonna do?" hummed Ironhide.

"Play a card they weren't expecting," shrugged Jazz, walking away. "One they can't argue with."


	11. Unscrewed

The prank wars

Unscrewed

"So, Ratchet and the twins are still at this so called war?"

Jazz was leaned against Prowl's desk as the officer complained about the war. Prowl was shuffling papers, deciding whether or not to go curse out the group or to go to Optimus and complain some more. Jazz simply stood and nodded, pretending to listen to the officer as he spoke but ultimately thinking of ways that the pretend war could end.

"I do hope you have a method of stopping this?" snapped Prowl.

"I'm working on it. I have several ideas on stopping this but you know that they won't listen to me or anyone for that matter," grumbled Jazz.

"They'll listen to me," hissed Prowl, glaring at Jazz.

"Hardly. They didn't even consider Optimus when he spoke to them," countered Jazz.

"Humph. If they won't listen to Prime, what makes you think that they'll listen to you?" grumbled Prowl, looking away.

"I've got a plan," smirked Jazz.

"So what's your plan?" Prowl hummed, glancing at him.

Jazz smiled warmly. He sighed, pulling off the desk and heading for the door. Prowl watched him carefully. Jazz had that air about him that meant business, something he didn't like to fall back to most days. The special operations officer stopped in the door, glancing back at Prowl with his smile still present.

"I'm giving them one last chance to end this stupid game before I play the final card," Jazz nodded, waving a finger. "So, if you'll excuse me."

Jazz marched out of Prowl's office and went straight for the twins. The two weren't in their rooms, making the search a bit harder. Eventually he found them, sneaking off toward the Rec room with items clenched tightly in their hands. Their grins were near ear-to-ear. Jazz made a fake cough, gathering their attention. They turned to looked at him, smiles flickering.

"Jazz?" the two gasped.

"Twins," he replied.

"Don't tell me you want us to end this thing again. We told you before that Ratchet is gonna get it before we're done!" hissed Sideswipe.

"Yeah. We're not quitters," hummed Sunstreaker with a nod.

"Please, end this before I end it myself!"

The twins exchanged glances, serious expressions hiding their smiles. Finally the two burst out in laughter. Jazz groaned, watching the two nearly fall upon their sides with laughter. They found it funny. He did not.

"You? End this? Ha!" shouted Sideswipe.

"We'd soon give up than lose to you," chuckled Sunstreaker.

"Ratchet couldn't stop us, what makes you think you can!" howled Sideswipe.

"Not an order in the world could stop us!" laughed Sunstreaker, still weak around the knees.

"You've been warned," whispered Jazz. "What are you doing with those drills and screwdrivers?"

"Nothing!" the two gasped, hiding the tools behind their backs.

"Uh-huh," hummed Jazz.

"Now if you'll excuse us, we have some screws and bolts to hide," nodded Sideswipe.

Jazz jumped slightly as the twins ran off. He quickly dashed off to find Ratchet cursing out every part of his room. Several chairs were already in shattered pieces on the floor like it had collapsed under someone. The way Ratchet howled and cursed, it seems it fell out from beneath him. Jazz sighed, crossing his arms across his chest and shaking his head.

"See what this war brings?"

"Shut it, Jazz!" hissed Ratchet, nearly throwing a tool at him. "I don't need you preaching to me about this stupid prank war!"

"So you admit it's stupid?" hummed Jazz, smiling lightly.

"I admit nothing except that I'm going to kill those twins if it's the last thing I do!" shouted Ratchet, preparing to storm out.

"Please, Ratchet," sighed Jazz, grabbing the medic by the wrist. "You can stop this before I have to."

"Like you alone could merely stop this," growled Ratchet, pulling away. "Face it, Jazz. You can't stop this thing if you wanted to!"

Ratchet stormed off, with footsteps being heard for quite some time. Jazz stood in the loosened offices, a smile slowly forming upon his face. They wouldn't give in. Their bad for not giving in when the getting was good. Jazz sighed, placing a finger to the side of his head to activate the Comm. Link. He smiled again, nodding.

"So, I need your help to end this so called Prank War?"


	12. The Treaty of the Ark

A/N

This is the end. I know I ended this story rather abruptly but it needed an ending and I didn't want to spend another year working or forgetting it. I like the ending, because though originally simple it turned into something fun for every Autobot at the base. Enjoy and since I haven't said this in a while…Happy Pranking.

The Prank Wars

The Treaty of the Ark

Ratchet felt slightly uneasy as he looked for the twins. Something about what Jazz said was stuck to him, haunting him. He was cautious as he turned the corners. Still, there was no sight of Jazz or the twins. Ratchet couldn't tell if he was mad or glad by this. Eventually he caught sight of the twins standing in the door of the Rec room. Racing forward, Ratchet didn't realize the trap he was walking straight into.

The twins slunk carefully around, holding tight together as they walked through the base in search of the shows of their victory: an angry beyond repair Ratchet. That was the only thing that kept the smile upon their faces as they slowly walked around. The base was oddly quiet for the time of day. They figured there would someone, anyone, in the Rec room. Stepping closer, they caught sight of Ratchet in the doorway. Smiles huge, they rushed forward, straight into the same trap as Ratchet.

Running through the doors, the two parties soon realized their mistake as they stepped through holograms and into each other. Something clicked between the three and soon separation was impossible no matter how hard they tugged. Suddenly there was a swift kick to their sides and the three fell forward into one of the oddest of things: a slip-and-slide. Screaming and confused, the group continued to slide down the center of the Rec room.

"by Primus!" screamed Ratchet once they reached the end of the slide.

"What is going on!" howled sideswipe.

A rope soon found its way snuggly around the three and pulled them up with a great heave. The three fell forward, straight into the last thing they expected. The three pulled their faceplates out of the rather large pies with a great sigh. Optimus sighed as well, setting the two pie pans he was holding away. Bumblebee set the last pie pan beside the other two. The two looked over at Jazz who smiled and nodded. He stepped forward, standing before the tied together group with a large smile.

"Shall we call this war over?" he hummed, leaning over them.

"Yes…" stuttered the three.

"Good. Ironhide untie them please."

The rope released. Ironhide laughed hysterically, collecting the rope and marching off. Wheeljack came seemingly out of nowhere and pulled three magnets out from between the three. The group separated hastily, the twins hugging together for comfort. Jazz stood up straight, waving everyone off. Ratchet looked around, seeing all the other Autobots he had failed to see upon entry or his slide in. they all scattered, smiling and laughing as they left. Optimus patted Jazz on the shoulder. Prowl offered him a nod of approval.

"You two okay?" asked Jazz.

"Yes…" sputtered the twins, slowly getting their feet without separating their hug.

"Good," nodded Jazz. "Best be getting back to your room. It should be all cleaned up."

"Okay…" they mumbled, walking off, still hugging.

"Well, all's well that ends well," hummed Jazz, placing his hands behind his back and walking away.

"Wait!" cried Ratchet, grabbing the officer by the wrist.

"What?" sighed Jazz, glancing at the medic.

"How…when…who!" gaped Ratchet.

"I warned you three. I've ended it," hummed Jazz with a nod. "It was originally supposed to just be Optimus but soon everyone wanted a part. Hound did the holograms. Wheeljack the magnets so you three couldn't escape or get separated. Mirage offered a push. The slip-and-slide was Seaspary's idea. Optimus said we had to include him or it was another underwater mission. Ironhide tied you us. A few other bots pulled you up. Optimus and Bee finished the deal."

Ratchet stood dumbfounded. He had no words to express the horror and shock he had just experienced. Jazz smiled, patting the mech on the shoulder. He gave a little nod and walked away. Ratchet shook his head recollecting himself.

"So now what!" snapped Ratchet.

"The war is over." sighed Jazz.

"Who's the king of pranks?" grumbled Ratchet.

"Nobody or is everybody?" shrugged Jazz.

"Is that supposed to be the moral of the story or something?" Ratchet snarled.

"Could be," mumbled Jazz. "Is that not what you learned?"

"I learned never to declare a prank war against the Special Operations officer," huffed Ratchet.

"Now that is very true."


End file.
